Half-Wits Unite

Daily Stats
Words: 1500
Caffeine: morning cup + mid-morning cappuccino, which I spilled all over my bad-ass new shoes
Evil Calories: mozzarella sticks
Reality TV: ANTM

Is it me, or have people making the news been extraordinarily stupid lately?

For example, what is with the woman in Kansas who spent two years on her boyfriends toilet? I'm so confused by this story I almost can't find anything to say. He kept checking on her every day, asking her to come out, and she just kept saying "maybe tomorrow". When the police finally did come, her butt had grown onto the toilet seat. What I want to know is, why, after two years, did he call for help? You'd think after a couple days he would have suspected something was amiss. Now, clearly she had issues too. No normal, red-blooded woman would ever embark on such an enormous bowel catastrophe in a potential mate's bathroom. At most she may go in to dab her T-zone or check her teeth for spinach. If you decide to park it on his cammode for more than an hour, it's done. Game over. The magic is gone.