Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Mai Tai ask what you do?

Daily Stats
Words: some
Caffeine: morning cup + late afternoon cappuccino (and now I have a headache because there was a four hour span when my brain didn't have caffeine and it's angry at me)
Evil Calories: Cadbury chocolate eggs left over from Easter
Reality TV: ANTM

Usually, when someone asks me what I do, and I say I'm a writer, the first thing they say is, "Oh, are you published?" Then I have to keep myself from using the heel of my shoe to gouge their eyeballs out, force a smile and nonchalantly say, "No, not yet." And then it's done. I'm a loser. I'm instantly a wanna-be, hack failure. I usually get an awkward nod tagged with a "that's nice" or "oh, I see". Or, my favorite, I get to hear things like this: "Oh, well my friend Becky McAnnoying-Face just got published. She had agents mud wrestling over her, and her book went into auction and God bought it and now she's a frazzilionaire married to Clive Owen and working on her next book which will instantly save all the starving children in the world..." Yeah, thanks for sharing. Is the bathroom close? I just want to go bang my head on the toilet for a while.

So, I must take this opportunity to give mad props to the waitress at Kona Grill. At my birthday celebration, she asked what I did, and after taking a HUGE swing of the nine foot Mai Tai she delivered, I told her. And I added "but I'm not published" at the end just to speed things up. And she said "Well, you're still a writer!" And then she proceeded to ask all about my writing. So, she's officially on my awesome list. (Don't roll your eyes, you know you want to be on my awesome list too.)

3 comments:

Eileen said...

She brings Mai Tai's and she validates the writing profession? Dear God I hope you tipped well.

Elizabeth said...

Wow we have only just met and I think I am *smitten*. But you should also know I'm a shameless flirt and you may see me hitting on all your friends.
I can relate to your post. I stopped telling people I'm a writer for awhile because of the awkwardness. But after I had some published shorts, the awkwardness is still there I find. Maybe cuz we love our jobs and they don't?
Plus seems saying I'm a writer sounds like saying I'm an actor. It sounds like a pipe dream to some people.
Thanks for stopping by my place and leaving your calling card.
PS
where does the saying mad props come from (besides American Idol)?

Jana said...

Yeah that awkward pause after the fact is one of the worse feelings on the emotional spectrum. I usually scream out "Well I do get paid for my freelance stuff...uh....usually" to feel better about the situation.

People asking what my novel is about rates pretty high up there with questions I'd rather not answer as well. I mean, I'm not comfortable talking about it, and also, do you have thirty minutes while I explain it to you? Didn't think so. Leave me alone!

Happpy belated birthday!