Thursday, October 4, 2007

Can't swing a dead cat without hitting a moron!

Daily Stats
Words: too many wasted trying write/rewrite query letters
Caffeine: morning cup + midmorning cappuccino
Evil Calories: cookies (many)
Reality TV: DVR'd the Top Chef finale, but still need to watch it

So, I'm sitting in the library trying to have peace and quiet so I can work on my query letters. I'm one of those people that needs silence in order to write. I am very easily distracted by any kind of noise. Child screaming, the latest gag-worthy alternative rock blaring in the background...whatever. This is why I come to the library. No music. Everyone sitting quietly reading. Or at least that's how I remember the library being. But apparently, not anymore. Apparently its OK to bring your slew of children to the library and let them run free and scream at the top of their lungs. And apparently, its perfectly acceptable to run into someone you know and stand in the MIDDLE of the fiction section and exchange stories about your washer/dryer at top volume. I now know that Suzie McFatass, who looks as if she should be more concerned about the motor on her treadmill than the motor on her dryer, is irritated with her husband (poor bastard) because she wanted to go to Sears to get the new Kenmore Elite or Pristine or whatever the crap it's called, and he said "no" because he thinks he can fix it himself, yet he spends all his time bowling which, if you ask me, is probably because she's so freakin' annoying! If I had to listen to you whine incessantly all day about not getting your way, I'd want to get drunk and lob twenty pound balls around too!

Now I'm trying to rewrite the closing paragraph of my query, but I have the overwhelming inclination to inform the agent that if she reps me and sells my book, I must insist that it only be available in libraries where they flog rude, disruptive people like Suzie McFatass with angry bunnies.

On a lighter note, by darling and dearest friend Jenny emailed me today and said she was laughing out loud at my book, and finds herself thinking about it during the day, anticipating when she'll be able to read the next part. Honestly, could I hear anything better?




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