Caffeine: not enough
Evil Calories: still recovering from the 900 chocolate croissants I inhaled last weekend
Reality TV: DVR'd Tabatha's Salon Takeover
Ah, reality. It's so overrated, isn't it? If someone had given me the choice (and the bank account), I probably would have stayed in Vegas for another week. Or ten. Sunshine, slot machines and 24 hour margaritas? Sign me up! But, alas, I had to return. The bank account was dwindling and my husband refused to UPS my son to me (whatever!).
Of course, I wasn't able to ease back into real life gently. Oh, no. I returned home just in time for the partial demolition of our family room. Turns out all that pesky water made its way in through a crack in our foundation (dry heave) and we may have to dig a huge hole outside to get to the outer wall (double dry heave). Then, we realized we had a little visitor that snuck in when the walls came down. At first I thought it was a rat (triple dry heave + shrieking) but to my relief it was just a chubby chipmunk. Of course, Pep, our three legged, wheezing feline monster was totally shitting himself and tried several times to use it as a hackey sack. I felt so bad, so we banned Pep from the family room and set up on of those live traps, so we could just catch it and set it free.
But things took a downturn today for our poor little rodent squatter. He ran into the bathroom this morning, so I set the little trap in there and closed the bathroom door, figuring he'd eventually catch the scent of the bait (peanut butter and sunflower seeds). But when I went and checked on him, the poor little dude had apparently tried to climb up the toilet, but lost his footing and...well...rodents can't swim (except for the rats of NIHM, of course.) I felt horrible!!! Geez, you try and do good and it just backfires terribly. And I had to fish him out with our shrimp tempura fryer basket thingy (quadruple dry heave + tears).
I think I need a vacation from my vacation. I just want to write, but pesky ol' life just keeps getting in the way!!!!! Go away, life!!!!!